Writing Prompt #10

Rants. A well-written rant is witty, intelligent, funny, and can be inspiring. They are fun to read, and write. The point of a rant is not to vent, but to communicate to others why you’re provoked, or emotional. Let your passion flow. The best rants get carried away, but remember there’s always two sides to every issue. The best rants have a narrow focus and take aim at something specific.

Here’s a great example of a rant from freelance writer LZ Granderson. You may not agree with him, but he gets his point across.

angry girlToday’s prompt: In no more than 300 words give us your best rant. Rants can be cutting, sarcastic, scholarly, or just plain funny. You pick the tone. What bugs you? What drives you completely insane? What’s got you riled up? Don’t keep it inside, let it out! Post your rant here in the comments, or leave a link to your blog/website/google doc instead.


19 comments on “Writing Prompt #10

    • Welcome aboard, Brooke! You’re gonna love it. (The only problem: With all the good stuff on this site, I have a heck of a time getting to my own writing. :~P)

  1. Hi Brooke,

    Sorry about that. We usually do let you all know right in the prompt what to do. You can either post your whole story/rant/etc. here in the comments (which is what most people do because then sometimes we get a good discussion going) or if you want to post it on your own website, put a link right here in the comments and we can swing by and read it there.

    Marcy 🙂

  2. I don’t get it! I don’t get it!! I don’t get it!!!

    I feel like I’m under scrutiny. Judgment. Resentment.

    Free to be me? Are you kidding?

    Understood? Not hardly.

    Missed? Not in any way that counts.

    And then the guilt sets in. Maybe I’ve got it all wrong. Maybe I’m too focused on myself.

    But I’ve learned I just can’t play the game. Smile. Pretend everything is OK. Make an appearance. After all, what’s an hour or two every week?

    Yeah, well. I’m not big on hypocrisy. Especially not my own.

    So, what are the choices? Flit from location to location? I don’t think so.

    I want to get involved. I want to put down roots. I want to be all I can be, so I can help others be all they can be.

    I want to be real and genuine. When I fail, I don’t want to have to hide that fact. When I succeed, I want others to rejoice with me. Not because I’m something special, but because God has done something in or through me.

    What happened to weeping when others weep and rejoicing when they rejoice?

    But no, expressing too much emotion is a sign spiritual immaturity. Whatever!

    So, what do I do? Too often, I turn inward. Ah, what’s the use?

    But I can’t be too cynical. There are people who “get me.” They don’t walk away or ignore me. I have been abundantly blessed with many friends. Friends see my heart and understand my motives…even when I blow it.

    I want to be held accountable. But I want my brothers and sisters to cut the cords that keep me earthbound, not anchor me even more securely to the ground.

    I was created to soar…as were you!

  3. I like that, Stephanie. One day we’ll all be walking in perfect love, and these kinds of rants will be a wisp of morning mist on the dawn of eternity’s horizon.

  4. Why I Hate Rants Most of the Time

    Honey, if there’s anything I hate more than having my insides yanked out and hurled across the asphalt, it’s a rant. Most of the time, anyway. I’ve heard and read too many to know that behind a clever and calculated attempt at turning my attention toward said ‘issue du jour’ is a simmering cistern of un-dealt with emotions, and a wee little bald headed hurt telling me to pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.

    Rants are good at letting us know what’s wrong with the world, but not likely to foster any change. I can hardly imagine Jesus going on about the unruly state of the children interrupting Him, wanting to get close. He seemed to think blessing them was a better idea.

    Rants tend to be divisive, and very often leave the reader with the false impression that they have only two choices—side up with the ranter or be wrong.

    They can be downright detrimental at times. I recently unsubscribed from a blog I enjoyed following because it left me feeling so condemned over an issue I’d failed miserably at, and offered no light at the end of the tunnel. I get enough of that coming at me from every angle, I don’t need to hand someone a hammer and show them where to drive the nails. Rants very rarely consider walking in someone else’s shoes awhile.

    But I have to concede—if it’s done well; if it’s humble; if it passionately portrays something that matters and isn’t simply someone’s stab at the universe: their overpowering opinion oozing out of overweening pride; if it suggests solutions and proposes alternatives; if it’s intelligent and sincere, then, baby, bring it on—the world languishes for more of these.

  5. I hate squirrels. Well, not all squirrels – just one specifically. The one that chose to make its nest in my window box. It considerately waited until after I bought flowers and broke up the hard dirt to move in.

    At first I was just going to wreck the nest. Be off you foul flower-wrecking villain! But, before I had a chance the fiend gave birth in the nest.

    For the past two summers I have battled with squirrels, perhaps this same squirrel, to save my flower bulbs from squirrel thievery. Last fall we had to oust the freeloaders from our attic. I find it difficult to have empathy for a creature that favors burglary and pilfering to a handout. I’d gladly buy a bag of birdseed and donate to the cause of squirreldom if it would save my flowers. I live in the Forest City – go find a tree! My window box liner is ruined.

    So, while others find the fluffy-tailed chattering creatures cute and fun to watch, I have seen their true nature. Sure, they are part of God’s bountiful creation – but I don’t like deer ticks or mosquitoes or moose on a dark highway either.

    Now, before you count me as an insensitive lout and threaten to chain yourself to my bedroom window in defense of the voiceless furballs – hear me out. We only have two hot summer months so I must revel while I can. I have been waiting to tend my garden and open my window to enjoy fragrant blooms. Now I have a squirrel – I call her Jezebel – and my black lab CJ is more than up for the task.

    I’m not without compassion. I haven’t pitched the squirming balls of purplish flesh from the second storey. I haven’t drowned them ‘watering’ the one flower that’s survived. But don’t think I haven’t considered it. Foul brute!

    (Before you report me to PETA or the Humane Society, this was meant as a funny expression of my frustration. I have no intention of killing the squirrels.)

    • Haha. Wow, you are seriously obsessed with those squirrels. I think you created this prompt for the sole purpose of writing about them.

      Glad to know you don’t plan to kill them though. I might have had to come chain myself to your window box in protest 😛

    • Nuts. 🙂

      Why don’t you pack up the whole window box, nest and all, and plunk it in the back bush? They’ll have a new home, and you can just start over.

      • If squirrels are anything like birds (and I think they are), moving the nest would end up resulting in their little deaths 😦 Inventive idea though.

  6. Hey guys! I just went on a bathing suit rant on my bathing suits:) No prompt needed:) I was reading your rant Lisa and my daughter’s friend is terrified of squirrels. She calls them rats with tails. In her mind they are creepy beasties that live in trees and glower down at you–watching and waiting until your back is turned… Actually, my oldest daughter went on walk and was chased down the street by a furry fluffy stalking squirrel!
    Mary Ann Benjamins

  7. A fellow squirrel-hater. 🙂 See Marcy. They really are horrible creatures. lol. I think she might unfriend me if I hastened those squirrel’s demise. I liked your rant. Very appropriate. Thanks for sharing, Mary Ann.

  8. Hey Marcy and Lisa,

    I just saw your writing prompt today. Hope I’m not to late.

    Do people hear themselves when they call a business? And how do they manage to ask the same dumb questions?

    I’m a secretary by trade and a writer by passion. I worked at an engineering firm and the phone calls were funny, but irritating.

    “May I speak to John Spencer?”

    “I’m sorry, sir, he is out of the office.”

    “Out of the office? But I just talked to him!” in a raised voice of unbelief.

    At this point, I wanted to say, “Sir, let me put you on hold. I need to get out my magic wand and wave him back into the office.”

    Another frequent scenario:

    “May I speak to John Spencer?”

    “I’m sorry sir, he is out of town.”

    “Out of town? All day?” in panicked tones.

    Sigh. Where is that magic wand?

    But then I remember Christ’s patience with me. There are many times I go through the process of turning a problem over to him, only to grab it back. And yet, He stands ready with open arms until I fully give Him the problem. Ah, the peace that passes all understanding. Am I going to pass that peace onto others or continue to rant?

  9. Your passion is very clear. Well done. Not all rants are funny or over the top. Well done. Thanks for sharing. I do contract work for a non-profit radio ministry TWR – so this was very interesting to me.

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